Winter Revisited

I awoke around 3:00 AM this morning with every good intention of traveling the 25 miles to work. I peaked out the window as the coffee was brewing to view that pristine white mantle of snow that Mother Nature and Jack Frost had conceived in the middle of the night. What a lovely sight it was except that I must ready myself for the drive to work. One of the major Interstates is visible from my front window and I could see that while northbound traffic was moving along, the southbound drivers were struggling. Not very encouraging, since the southbound route is the first leg of my morning journey.

A few cups of hot coffee while surfing the news sites on the Internet cleared the cobwebs in my head. Terrible treacherous conditions out there. Hmmm, better check my favorite online dating site to take my mind off the thoughts of this horrendous to be morning commute. It seems that all the usual suspects have already decided to sleep in this morning.

I took my morning shower and then donned my warmest of winter clothing ready to tackle the chore of cleaning off the car. Armed with a 12 inch ruler that doubles as an oven rack pusher-puller, which I would use to measure the depth of the white wet stuff, and my trusty broom, I ventured out the door to meet the wintry onslaught head on. No longer were there any flakes a falling, but now the precipitation had changed to a mist of sleet. I drove the ruler into the snow and gauged it at around 8”. Minor accumulation I thought. Nothing that should prevent me from making it to work. As I began sweeping the snow from the car, my hands suddenly sent a message to my brain. You idiot. The gloves are in the car. My brain then sent a message to the rest of my body. Prepare to freeze to death. I swept the broom along the doors and windows clearing them and then hit the lock release button on the key ring. It clicked fine, but the doors were frozen shut. I swept some more, but the broom broke from the weight of the snow. Back upstairs for a new broom and possibly a pair of gloves, but I soon remembered that the second pair was also securely locked within the car.

More sweeping and then I was finally able to open the back door of the vehicle, climb in and over the front seat and start the beast of burden. I was pleased with the smooth start and cranked the heater , defroster and rear window defroster up full blast. I wanted this hunk of metal and the cold leather seats, warm and toasty, before I made the final commitment to embark upon this journey.

The car is now ready and I went upstairs to finish my preparations for the day at hand. Shaved and dressed for the day, I fed the cat and bid him a fond farewell. Back out into the winter morning now, I restarted the car, placed her in reverse and backed out of the parking space. Perfect up to this point, but as I shifted to "go" and gingerly gave the beast some gas, all I heard was the spinning of tires and my RPM gauge climbing as I moved nowhere. No traction. I reversed again thinking that a running start might help. Nope!!! Two more attempts and I thought that this would be a lovely day to go back into the warmth of the house and stay there until March or April. I couldn’t get back into the original parking space, so I had to reverse back into the space across from my building. I walked back up the stairs feeling somewhat totally inadequate, even impotent, for not being able to travel forward, but only in reverse. My psychotic cat leered at me with that “you’re home early” look.

I called my boss of the day as he was on his way to work. I explained the situation and the news broadcasts of the treacherous road conditions. I advised him of the problems on a certain highway and he responded that he was just turning onto that certain highway and the last I heard from him was, “Oh, SHIT.” Well, I’ll talk to him tomorrow.

Hundreds of schools closed and even some corporate offices advised their employees to stay home. So, I think my thoughts of inadequacy are unfounded. Even St. Louis University closed today and they never close. It might be a good day to simply browse my favorite website.